The Lake House Dream

This picture doesn't even come close to my dream. I haven't had a dream like this since I was a teenager. When I woke up to my alarm I couldn't STAND that I was back in the world. I knew it was cycling class...I LOVE cycling class and my legs needed the break from running. But I wanted to go back there SO BADLY. I turned off the alarm, prayed a pleading prayer...and I got to go back. You are going to think this is silly, but I am crying even as I write this. I was/am so grateful. This was heaven...my heaven. It was MY Lakehouse...it had a pool, it looked like one of the old homes in Melrose but I can't figure out which one. The yard and gardens were so breath takingly lovely...they were protecting us...they loved us...the very TREES were my friends. I kept standing in the large open foyer looking out at the water...AND THE POOL...the children were everywhere...on the tree swing, the front porch swing, the tree house, the garden, the guest house, the kitchen. Little snuggy areas filled the whole property and there was yummy food and drink at each of them. As I stood in the foyer I marveled at the wood work--such detail, but not too fancy...all the furnishings were perfect...not new, but COMFORTABLE ---it was like you could "feel" the furnishings and each of them were begging to be chosen to be used. I look to my right in to the library and it is filled with 1,000's of books even though it didn't appear that large--and I knew and LOVED every book in there. Each title I passed over would fill me with such exuberant feelings I wish I had word...some of the feelings were confidence, sweetness, understanding, inquisitiveness, memories...but all of them evoked a LOVE I cannot remember ever feeling. I belonged to the books the way the house belonged to me. We were one...in purpose and feeling. Josh ran through and grabbed my leg like he would do when he was little and without words let me know that he is about important stuff but is never far from me. I just smothered him with kisses like when he was little ending with a zerbet and off he went and I was so content to have him go. Michael was in the back garden (too astonishing to even start to describe) looking for this girl that we both loved so deeply...(how symbolic is that?) Megan was already with this boy WE both loved on the water with a boat full of kids and I could hear and FEEL their laughter as they just enjoyed each other and being there. Spencer and Sam were on the front lawn teaching my OTHER?? children how to play Rugby without getting hurt???Boys and girls...they were all trash talking each other ----but the sweetest most loving trash talking I've ever heard. THE THEME of this whole dream was LOVE. It just ooooooozed with LOVE . They kept razzing Sam because he kept going off to grab food and then coming back. In the kitchen my OTHER children are making surprise cookies for the GRANDAD's on the back golf range...I wonder why Spencer isn't with them and he telepathically tells me he doesn't want to make them feel bad and I hear him laugh. I start to wonder what GRanDaD's and then I see them....THIRTY or so of them...I KNOW them all, and they all know each other and again, we all just love each other so much. Don is across the lake at his Family's lakehouse and I wonder if they'll be joining us. I keep looking at the woodwork and design of the house and wonder how the builders knew to build it SO PERFECTLY to my taste...even the linens were just so perfect. And the smell of the house. THere were so MANY....the BBQ, the bread, the cookies, the orange blossoms, the magnolia's (I haven't smelled the last two in YEARS), the gingerbread cinnamon something on the front porch. OK...the porch....I want to try to draw this house ...this is weird, but the HOUSE loved me. The porch had all my friends just visiting and laughing. Ali was out on the front lawn showing us how well she could do round offs (Ali has MS and is struggling to walk right now) MY GRANDmoTHER went and joined her adding a double something FLIP. The bedrooms were decadent with out alot of furniture...there weren't any TV's but you didn't want one because you didn't want to miss out on the relationship stuff happening everywhere all around you. THe sun was LOVING me...literally sending feelings in it's rays of it's happiness to touch my skin and warm my world. The pool water said something to me that made me giggle...the Lake water called me promising to one up the pool feelings. The dock was long and had that mid summer smell with picnic basket in the middle and cash of multicolored bottled drinks on ice. Watermelon slices were on a tray at the end. It seemed like pretty much everyone I've ever known and loved was there with me...I had invited them all and they ALL came...everyone that I invited....a SWIM teacher from when I was 7 years old was shooting hoops in the side yard...how bizarre is that? I don't know that I've EVER even thought of her since she gave me my SHARK certificate when I left. Marie Gabordi who I went to grade school with was riding horses with her dad who died when we were in the 5th grade.
I was barefoot and loved my feet, I sent love to my feet for all my runs, and they sent love back for my taking them there??...I had flashes of these incredulous runs I had been on that to date I HAVE NOT been on.
There was this fruit on the table next to me that made my mouth water just being near it...I could hold the taste in my mouth. I thought that if I could replicate it I could make our fortune for dieting people...then I heard the laughter and remembered that NO ONE dieted here, and we ALREADY had our fortune...what more would I want? It was a challenge to me...whoever, whatever, WANTED me to dream up something more spectacular so that they could be about producing it. At that moment I was just this bursting light with all of me focusing on what could be better and I had this bizarre creative moment and suddenly across the lawn a NEW little girl came running for me with her arms outstretched calling me Momma. I was so overcome and when she reached me we were both light together.
Shayne's birds would fly in these formations that he would think up...Shayne is SO funny anyway, but the things he would have these birds do just by thinking had all of us laughing on the ground...and JaLee (his wife, not such a bird lover) would then send in HER birds and out wit him and he only delighted in her delight.
Now that I think about it, I don't remember seeing my mom and dad.... weird. Anyway. I could barely stand to finally wake up.

I was not on drugs people. I was actually pretty darn depressed yesterday and the day before...I'm not sure depressed is the right word. Just tired and discouraged. It's a good thing I don't dream like that all the time or I would never want to wake. i would keep trying to sleep.I even kept trying again this morning after I awoke the second time to go back. I don't care WHERE this place is...I don't care if it's not real....it was SO REAL for me this morning. THINKING about it makes me happy. I wish I could bring it back. I wish I could really bring you there with me....although, you already were.
I need a pshchologist. I want to understand. Ok, Maybe I don't want to understand. I just want to go back. If that was what drugs do to you...I SOOOO get why people can't leave them alone.
If I could recreate this in a movie and have everyone in the theatre's FEEL what I was feeling....that would be our fortune. Suddenly I want a Lake House. I want to create that place. Where do I get that LIGHT from that just created my little girl...?????

While I was just showering and STILL not letting go of the dream I remembered that even though it was MY lakehouse, we had named it CHRISTOPHER's Place and it was located on lake Christopher. I was straining my mind to think of all the Christopher's I'v known and WHY my mind would NAME it that...Chris Cooper is a DEAR friend of ours. But then I went to the Baby name meaning site and here is what I read:

From the Late Greek name Χριστοφορος (Christophoros) meaning "bearing Christ", derived from Χριστος (Christos) combined with φερω (phero) "to bear, to carry". It was used by early Christians as a metaphorical name, expressing that they carried Christ in their hearts. In the Middle Ages, literal interpretations of the name's etymology led to legends about a Saint Christopher who carried the young Jesus across a river. He has come to be regarded as the patron saint of travellers.

I am speechless. Now I just want to lay down and think about it some more.